Sniper, Not Shotgun
Win a mentor by prepping the environment and giving before you ask
- Difficulty
- Moderate
- Time to result
- ~months to results
- Steps
- 6
- Confidence
- 86%
Sniper, Not Shotgun treats mentorship like precision marksmanship rather than a numbers game. Most people take a shotgun approach: identical, low-effort, non-tailored DMs blasted at many targets. Sanchez argues you instead pick one target and 'prep the environment', spending disproportionate time researching them so the value you offer is impossible to ignore. The sequence is staged like dating: a tiny first engagement (the Tinder swipe) to register, then a value-added touch with no ask, then progressively opening the window until a relationship forms that can become mentorship. The engine is reciprocity plus patience: give repeatedly without expectation and one of those gifts eventually returns. The real barriers are fear of rejection and unwillingness to invest time in a single person.
Origin
Extracted from Deep Dive with Ali Abdaal. Sanchez built her network of mentors, including Tim Ferriss and Bill Perkins, through low-level, high-value first engagements rather than cold asks, and productised the method into a Contrarian Thinking video on landing any mentor.
Core principles
- 01Relationships start with tiny, low-stakes engagements
- 02Give value with zero ask before you request anything
- 03Obsessive preparation on one person beats mass outreach
- 04Reciprocity means a giver eventually gets repaid
- 05Fear and laziness are why most people fail at this
How to run it
- 1
Pick one target
Select a single high-value person rather than a broad list. Precision requires focus.
Pro tip You are usually only one degree away from almost any mentor you want.
Watch out The shotgun approach of DMing everyone guarantees failure.
- 2
Prep the environment
Research the person obsessively until you understand what would genuinely help them. Check wind and sun before you take the shot.
- 3
Make the tiny first engagement
Introduce yourself briefly in person or online. A quick 'I love your stuff, I might send you something interesting' is your opening swipe.
- 4
Deliver value with no ask
Follow up with something specific and useful, like curated data or an insight tailored to their current work, attaching no request.
Pro tip The gift should be so valuable they would be crazy not to accept it.
Watch out Any ask this early collapses the relationship.
- 5
Open the window repeatedly
Keep giving in small increments, widening the opening each time, until a genuine two-way relationship exists.
Watch out Do not expect any single gift to be returned; expectation poisons the process.
- 6
Let mentorship emerge
Once the relationship is real, it naturally becomes a mentorship. You never had to formally ask for one.
In the wild
Sanchez's team demonstrated the method by taking one idea and using tailored, value-first outreach to get her colleague Christian in front of a major podcaster he admired. They did it without money and without existing networks, and the podcaster reached out independently.
→ A cold, high-value target became a warm connection through preparation alone.
Common mistakes
The shotgun DM blast
Sending low-level, unspecific, non-tailored outreach to many people at once reads as selfish and gets ignored.
Asking before giving
Leading with a request, however polite, feels selfish and closes the window before it opens.
Quitting after one unreturned gift
Reciprocity works over multiple gives. Expecting an immediate return, or fearing it won't come, stops people too early.
Is it for you?
Best for
Anyone trying to build a relationship with a hard-to-reach expert, creator or potential mentor.
Not ideal for
Situations needing an immediate transactional answer rather than a long-term relationship.
From the transcript
“you're one degree away from basically almost any mentoring want in the world”
“it is much easier than ever to get a mentor you just have to treat it like a sniper rifle never like a shotgun”
“your second level is going to be when you reach out to them it should be something really value-added with no ask”
From the episode
Unlock Financial Freedom: Secrets From A $50 Million Portfolio - Codie Sanchez
Codie Sanchez