The Tombstone Test
Find your purpose by asking what legacy you'd be ashamed of
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~days to results
- Steps
- 4
- Confidence
- 72%
The Tombstone Test is a purpose-clarifying mental model. Sanchez, then in private equity, dreamt her tombstone read 'Managing Director, Codie Sanchez' and recoiled, realising that could not be her legacy. The mechanism uses revulsion as data: picture the single label you'd get today, and if it repels you, that reaction points toward what you actually value. It need not be work-related; 'father' might be a worthy epitaph. The test pairs with David Brooks' distinction between resume virtues and eulogy virtues, the money-and-title achievements versus the things people say at your funeral. Because milestones like income and follower counts are markers rather than destinations, Sanchez also builds in a regular zoom-out, a weekly high-level segment, so the daily numbers don't quietly become the whole point.
Origin
Extracted from Deep Dive with Ali Abdaal. A vivid dream of her own tombstone reading only 'Managing Director' jolted Sanchez out of private equity and toward a mission of bringing more humans into ownership.
Core principles
- 01Your reaction to a legacy label reveals your true values
- 02Purpose need not be work-related
- 03Revulsion is as informative as aspiration
- 04Milestones like money are markers, not destinations
- 05Zoom out regularly or the daily numbers consume you
How to run it
- 1
Picture the label today
Imagine the single phrase that would appear on your tombstone if you died now, based on how you currently spend your life.
- 2
Read your reaction
Notice whether the label satisfies or repels you. Revulsion is a signal that you're on the wrong path.
Pro tip The epitaph need not be about work; 'good father' can be a great one.
- 3
Name the epitaph you want
Articulate what you would want written instead. That becomes your directional purpose.
Pro tip Separate eulogy virtues from resume virtues; funerals rarely celebrate job titles.
- 4
Reorient and zoom out regularly
Realign daily work toward the legacy you want, and schedule a recurring zoom-out so day-to-day metrics don't hijack the mission.
Pro tip Sanchez runs a weekly 10-minute high-level segment with her team to stay zoomed out.
Watch out Numbers people especially get sucked into daily or weekly KPIs and lose the plot.
In the wild
In a dream, Sanchez walked through a cemetery and saw her own tombstone reading 'Managing Director, Codie Sanchez.' Her instinctive disgust made her realise a private-equity title could not be her legacy, and reset her purpose toward expanding ownership for ordinary people.
→ Left private equity and built a mission around bringing more humans into ownership.
Common mistakes
Chasing mimetic milestones
Picking a job for outside reasons and sticking with it for decades is how people arrive at a deathbed of regret.
Letting the scoreboard become the purpose
KPIs like followers or revenue are markers on a map, not the destination. Without regular zoom-outs they quietly become the whole game.
Is it for you?
Best for
Anyone unsure whether their day-to-day work is aligned with a life worth living.
Not ideal for
Someone who already has deep clarity on purpose and needs execution, not reflection.
From the transcript
“I like to think about a tombstone and mine... it just said like managing director Cody Sanchez and I was like oh gross”
“there are resume virtues and then there are eulogy virtues the things that you would write on your resume and then they're the things that…”
From the episode
Unlock Financial Freedom: Secrets From A $50 Million Portfolio - Codie Sanchez
Codie Sanchez